Innocence is Bliss

For the most part, Ava lives in a world free from the feelings of fear, shame, rejection, and embarrassment. She doesn't ponder her value or self-esteem. She doesn't ache inside with hurt feelings inflicted by the cruelty of others. But as much as I hate this- one day she will. Sometimes as I watch her play- full of sweet innocence- I find myself imagining the inevitable. She walks through the livingroom holding pretend food on a "tray" made from a book, and I picture her in middle school carrying her lunch toward the tables wondering who she might sit beside, as fear of being an outsider wells up inside. I see her join in happily with the slightly older little girls running in a circle at the mall play area, and I imagine that one day she'll try to join in only to find sharp rejection. I see her cry after falling down, and I imagine one day she'll cringe with embarrassment after falling in front of people. I wish I could protect her from these feelings. She's my baby girl. But I know I can't keep them from her. All I can do is reassure her every day of her value. Remind her that she is loved by God and loved by her family. Tell her about all the wonderful qualities and talents that make her special. Pray with her, and listen to her concerns, and hold her when she's hurting. That's all I can do.