Saturday, March 15, 2008

Strange Experience

Between sleeping in and getting a pedicure, I had one of the strangest experiences. It has never happened before, and I bet it will never happen again. I was grocery shopping at Super Target when I turned the corner and saw an old woman who looked exactly like my grandma. The resemblance was striking. Seriously, I just stood frozen to the spot, staring at her for a moment. I walked toward her slightly because I was feeling an urge to tell her how much she resembled my grandma. As I started to say "You look just like my grandma..." I started bawling. Thankfully, she was kind (even though she was probably thinking "What a crazy woman!" to herself while glancing around for security.) She asked if my grandma was still living, to which I replied that she had passed away about 2 years ago. I blubbered a little more, and uttered some apologies. The old woman said she would take it as a compliment. Then we both went our separate ways. I was still wiping streaming warm tears from my face. It was one of the most surreal experiences I've ever had. It was such a perfect combination of her height, build, posture, facial features, hairstyle...everything about her just screamed out to me. The shock of seeing this woman was overwhelming, and the sadness I felt in knowing that my grandma is gone was palatable. It was a grief that I didn't even know existed, in that way, until today. It took quite a while for me to calm my nerves and return to my senses. And then, I was back to normal. It was a very contained experience. As I reflect on it now, I am not overtaken by that same extreme sorrow or wave of emotion. It must be the visual stimulus that sent me over the edge. Has anyone else had a similar experience?

1 comment:

Brandy said...

Becky -

(This is Phillip, not Brandy)
I have had a very similar experience. I saw a woman downtown who looked so much like my grandmother (who had been deceased about 5 years) that I seriously began conjuring up some reason in my head that she might have faked her death. I was walking up to speak to her when I heard her speak...she had a very raspy (i.e. 40 year smoker) voice. Nothing like my grandmother's voice. The eeriness of the moment immediately passed when I heard her speak.